Autism and a fourteen-year old’s solution for bullying

Autism and a fourteen-year old’s solution for bullying. This letter is a heartwarming story written by a mother on behalf of her son, and how a fourteen year-old girl has helped the son to hope. A stirring example of practical love that is quite an inspiration! In the mother’s own words……..

“Hi Kim, I wanted to send you a note and tell you about Kara. She has seen my son Max several times this summer, and has been very nice to him. She and her friends even play games with him at the local swimming pool, where they shoot baskets and probably let him win at the game of PIG. Kara always smiles, and never acts as though he bugs her (even though I know he probably does). She even promised she would see a movie with him sometime.

I know this doesn’t seem like much, but let me explain. A lot of kids are nice to Max, say hi, and take a photo now and then. However a lot are just mean, tease and even punch him to see him meltdown. Taking him out in public is a real struggle because I don’t know which will happen. At night, he cries and struggles to “fix himself” wanting to just be normal and accepted. However he often melts down and can’t sleep. I often go three days to get just seven hours of sleep. Max is autistic and has obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD).

On the other hand, when Kara and her friends treat Max so well, he has a smile for the rest of the night. He eats dinner, and often feels so good about himself that his creativity emerges. Surprisingly he will try to develop a new formula in an effort to cure Aids, or get out his telescope and work on his “Sun twin” theory. Alternatively, he can invent incredible origami pieces, or just design a new form of candy. Afterward he goes to sleep in peace, feeling like he is really worth something. As you ponder this, please note that Max (not yet finished high school) has already passed some entry exams for college, and even shared with a scientist his studies on Aids.

We have tried for years to get Max involved in some kind of sport, since he has a strong arm. His mechanical mind can quickly judge a throw, and in basketball he makes 90% of his baskets, and at least 80% of his passes in football. After shooting baskets with Kara, he has decided that he likes basketball and maybe would like to become a “manager” or “waterboy”.

For fourteen years the love and compliments of his family were all he needed, but since age fifteen he seems to require the acceptance of peers, and that is something I cannot provide.

In summary, Kara has brought peace to our often hectic life, even if just for a day. And that to me is a true angel. This kind and considerate personality is a wonderful and rare quality nowadays. It is a quality that will shine through and take her above the rest…..she is a real Princess!”

(The Gray Nomad): Wow! What lessons for life are peeping out of the above words. For instance, the embedded phrase “Afterward he goes to sleep in peace, feeling like he is really worth something” is how we can feel if we know God as our Father, despite the troubles going on in our lives.

The statement “She is a real Princess!” relates to my book** where the coangel Michelle always called Kara a princess. It is in fact the very same Kara! She has learned from Michelle to help someone to hope.

Thank you Dee of Independence, Kansas, for sharing this wonderful letter. This example may inspire kids to be kind to others no matter what disabilities they may have.

The Gray Nomad.
Probing the practice of Christian believers….

** Hiking Toward Heaven….see the website

“Long ago I gave these commands to my people: You must see that justice is done, and must show kindness and mercy to one another” (Zechariah, chapter 7).

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8 comments on “Autism and a fourteen-year old’s solution for bullying”

  1. Marlene says:

    Ian, thank you for sharing this story with us. It touched my heart. I have often thought of how terrible bullying is, and that most of the young ones that are doing the bullying will probably grow up and regret. But by then it is too late. I will pray for this young man for I know his heart is breaking. How sad for him and his parents who love him and want the best for him. I do know that one person can make a difference in a child’s life. Kara will also be blessed for her kindness.

    1. IanPalmer says:

      Thanks for the thoughtful comment Marlene, and I hope this blog does reach and touch other hearts also.

  2. Lorraine says:

    Ian, thank you for sharing this BEAUTIFUL letter. It certainly brought tears to my eyes. What a huge impact Kara’s kindness has made in this young man’s life! Max is amazing and Kara is a princess!

    1. IanPalmer says:

      Yes, and isn’t it awesome that a fourteen year old can inspire all of us to do more to help someone to hope?

  3. jody crane kawulok says:

    What a wonderful message of how teenagers can be kind and helpful instead of mean and hurtful. Kara and friends are to be commended for befriending Max. And Max, the genius, hopefully will grow to cure horrible diseases and rise above the unkind characters in his life. With God anything is possible……..

    1. IanPalmer says:

      It is a wonderful message Jody, and is an inspiration to me to be on the lookout for when I can help others in need.

  4. Kim says:

    Kara has a big heart and is sensitive to God’s leading. What a selfless and loving girl!

    1. IanPalmer says:

      Lovely words Kim……you put your finger right on it. Thanks.


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